• People collect boredom, they hoard it, they wallow in it, hoping that one day it'll be of interest and become an effete ennui. Let me tell you, it doesn't.
    People collect boredom, they hoard it, they wallow in it, hoping that one day it'll be of interest and become an effete ennui. Let me tell you, it doesn't.
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  • The one thing politicians will always vote for is more politics, so in 2000 they invented the post of mayor of London without ever really thinking what it was a mayor would do.
    The one thing politicians will always vote for is more politics, so in 2000 they invented the post of mayor of London without ever really thinking what it was a mayor would do.
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  • It is impossible to be taken seriously in shorts. No one has ever cared about anything said by a man in shorts.
    It is impossible to be taken seriously in shorts. No one has ever cared about anything said by a man in shorts.
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  • Personal adornment is the only cultural form that everybody in the world takes part in.
    Personal adornment is the only cultural form that everybody in the world takes part in.
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  • I've often been accused of dressing too well. I've always been fascinated by fashion, though I don't think I'm particularly fashionable.
    I've often been accused of dressing too well. I've always been fascinated by fashion, though I don't think I'm particularly fashionable.
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  • The real question is: if you knew there was a god, would you behave any differently? And if the answer is yes, then perhaps you should assume there is.
    The real question is: if you knew there was a god, would you behave any differently? And if the answer is yes, then perhaps you should assume there is.
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  • Twenty is a tough age because it slips past in the middle of so much else - university, gap year, leaving home, getting jobs.
    Twenty is a tough age because it slips past in the middle of so much else - university, gap year, leaving home, getting jobs.
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  • This is the trouble with cheating: there are no acceptable rules, or laws. It could be a smile, or dancing to a song that you considered to be indefinably 'ours'. It can feel like cheating to go to a restaurant that you used to go to with someone else. Keeping photographs of exes can infuriate, like retrospective cheating.
    This is the trouble with cheating: there are no acceptable rules, or laws. It could be a smile, or dancing to a song that you considered to be indefinably 'ours'. It can feel like cheating to go to a restaurant that you used to go to with someone else. Keeping photographs of exes can infuriate, like retrospective cheating.
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  • No 13-year-old or over should ever be seen in trousers that finish above the ankle. It doesn't matter how good your legs are, or if you're on a beach in Bermuda where they invented the things.
    No 13-year-old or over should ever be seen in trousers that finish above the ankle. It doesn't matter how good your legs are, or if you're on a beach in Bermuda where they invented the things.
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  • And learn to tie a bow - it's not difficult and there's no excuse for either a clip-on or the hideous Hollywood straight tie.
    And learn to tie a bow - it's not difficult and there's no excuse for either a clip-on or the hideous Hollywood straight tie.
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